Feeling Sorry for Myself and Books

It’s been a bit of a crappy week here at Chez Arbo, sleep-wise. Things were actually going pretty smoothly but I think we are in the midst of a big ol’ sleep regression. Kale has been going to bed relatively well, but when he wakes in the wee wee wee hours of the morning, and gets fed, he doesn’t want to go back to sleep in his crib, and after upwards of an hour or trying, I just bring him to bed with me and he sleeps just fine. Unfortunately, I sleep CRAPPY when he’s in bed with us – I feel stiff and sore when I wake up and that freakin’ sucks. But I hate being up for 90 minutes in the middle of the night, so I select which is the lesser of two evils. 

He also had a session of robo-puking last night, and of course, it happened to be when I was out and Daddy was “on shift”. Kale’s not a puker. He really hasn’t been a spit-uppy kinda boy since 2-3 months old. So this was a surprise. I’m putting it down to the wrong combination of foods at dinner because after the robo-puking he was happy go lucky and wanted to party. Not feverish or anything. 

He’s also been anti-nap. He needs them (hoo boy does he need them!) because when he finally gets down to the napping part he will sleep for 1-2 hours, more than his normal 45 minutes, but he resists them at all costs and there have been more than one napping sessions where we physically have to hold down his wee little arm because he keeps HITTING HIMSELF IN THE FACE while he thrashes about in our arms. And by “we” I mean “me”, because it seems it’s always me putting the boy to bed lately unless I go out – and that’s not a reflection of Ross, that’s a reflection of the routine I’ve created. I’ve tried a few different things to try and make it smoother for Kale, to help him learn how to go to sleep on his own, but have to keep coming back to the steadfast routine and am just hoping this works itself out because seriously? I am getting flat out annoyed and find myself muttering “seriously, kiddo, you need to learn how to put yourself to bed, argh” under my breath at him. 

I’m also feeling a bit like Kale is starting to wean, or at least significantly restructure his breastfeeding. He takes hardly anything from me when I offer him the breast all day, but he still drinks well at night and early morning. But during the day, he will latch and drink and then refuse the breast after only a little snack. So I get the impression he’s trying to tell me something but I feel a little bit at a loss of how to proceed without causing supply problems or starving him or causing mastitis or something. I also feel a little bit unsure of his food choices too – Kale has 10-15 items he loves loves loves and I noticed lately that I keep coming back to those rather than trying to move on to the next level.

Anyway, this too shall pass, right? My confidence just feels shaky this week.  I’m just having an off week. I know this is all perfectly normal and things will work out and that everything is okay. 

 So what else is new besides the sleep woes and the food questions? Well, I have been doing all sorts of research to officially launch Chai By Night as a real live business in a few months. Finding out what sort of licenses and numbers and registrations I need and getting permissions from stratas and all that sort of fun jazz. I also booked a hair appointment for Thursday night and so I need to find me a style tout suite to bring to my stylist and say “make me like that”. I had tentatively planned to go shopping Thursday or hopefully stop by a Gardening event here locally, but my stylist was only available Thursday night for a late night appointment and my vanity (and sanity) says that I need to make that my priority. This weekend is also another shiba meetup and I think Kale and I are going to go without our shiba who is too shiba to go to the shiba parties so that Ross can get in a birthday ride by himself. 


From Mooki

Anyway, lastly, I need some book recommendations from you guys. I don’t want anything that has to do with child rearing, babies, breastfeeding, food, sleep or any other topic I am burnt out on. And it needs to be available from Chapters.ca as I was given a gift card for them for my birthday. I’d love something like Malcolm Gladwell’s books (read them all, love them all, own them all) or some nice escape-y fiction like a Greg Iles book. I like suspense, and thrillers, and historically accurate books, especially ones that are Canadian in nature. So, does anyone have any suggestions?

13 years ago


  1. Hey hon
    He’s not weaning- don’t worry. Around 9 months most babies change their patterns due to a number of factors- teething, growth, attention, solids, etc. Keep offering the breast!! It’s common for babies to not want to nurse at all during the day, but cluster feed at nite. Remember the supply and demand rule- he’s becoming super efficient and your body will make exactly what he needs- for example, if he’s only doing drive by nursing, your milk is probably high test. 🙂
    Have you guys considered a king sized bed? Or, pulling his crib into your room? Just ideas…

  2. Hi Jen,
    Yep, just when things are feeling like they are going smoothly, kids try something new. I think it is designed to keep us humble. What you are describing is quite commom for Kale’s age. He is likely too busy during the day with his new-found mobility and more aware of his surroundings, so breastfeeding takes a back seat, except at night, when things are quieter. It is also a time for teething, which makes kids wakeful. Have you tried nursing him in your bed during the day? Also, no TV, no music, to distract him. And you are right, this too shall pass. In the meantime, know that you are a great mom.
    PS – I finally mailed you the ‘iron’ handout today! sorry for delay – I’ve been off work with a nasty virus.
    And by the way, a Happy Belated Birthday. 35 looks good on you.
    Take care,

  3. I can only speak from experience with Moira but at 9 months she was still nursing ALL THE TIME because she was trying to get SOMETHING out of me that wasn’t there anymore – so she definitely wasn’t weaning and I think you would know if Kale was changing because your supply decreased (my breast were never heavy anymore). I’ve heard that busy kids will change around 9 months and mostly want to nurse in the morning and at night because there is way too much to do during the day.

    This line cracked me up: “This weekend is also another shiba meetup and I think Kale and I are going to go without our shiba who is too shiba to go to the shiba parties” I love your dog.

    Will think of book recommendations.

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